I wanted to share...

I wanted to share a poem written by my beautiful and talented cousin Jessica Creech, who was a doula and calming presence for me the day Gunnar was born. Jessica shared this poem with me (that she wrote just a few hours after Gunnar was born) yesterday and it brought back so much emotion. With so few words she effortlessly captures the feelings we all shared in those moments after Gunnar arrived in this world. 

The Birth of Gunnar Miles Hammergren  

a poem by Jessica Creech

I first saw two inches of your fuzzy head
A sign of hope in pain and suffering
Then I saw your skin grow dark when the doctors said,
“Wait—don’t push” as they put on their protective gear and arranged their instruments
Like they had time
While you waited, unable to breathe, with the umbilical chord wrapped around your neck
Then they said, “Push,” and you came into the world
Blue and limp
And we all held our breath as you struggled for yours
While they took you over to a little table and put an oxygen mask on your tiny face
Your mother said, “Is he okay?” and buried her face into your father’s chest
Your grandmother bowed her head into her folded hands and I saw that tears had streaked her reddened cheeks
And we all prayed
And then there came
A spirit of peace in the room
As we waited in seconds that lasted forever
And we all knew then that birth is dangerous
And life and death are much closer than it seems
How God could be present in both miracle and tragedy
We hung in between
Till your cry covered all our fears
And you proclaimed the victory!

finally...Gunnar's first cry

Jessica, didn't know it at the time, but she was pregnant when Gunnar was born (a surprise). She is just weeks, possibly days, away from welcoming her third child into the world. Thank you Jessica. You are such an inspiration. May your 3rd birth be both magical and complication free. We are saying a little prayer for you everyday. We love you so much!

Jessica holding Gunnar (3 months) with her children Ela and Ian

Jessica and her daughter Ela.